Diplomacy

Last weekend at our bed and breakfast we received quite the earfull from the proprietor about her gay neighbors.

Evidently, the two men moved in next door a year ago. They claim that she built on the property line and she claims that they have spread rumors about her around town and have stolen some of her irrigation water. To seal the deal, the two men built a pig pen on her side of their property, right behind the bathroom windows of two rooms in her bed and breakfast.

Saturday morning at breakfast when Sharon was relaying this story to me and Kelly in addition to a couple from Colorado, she explained that they were "like this" because they are gay - which means they're "just weird." Evidently, the fact that they're gay means - in her world - that everything is off in their world, that every abnormality in their lives is explainable by their sexual orientation. Hardly the time or place for a lecture or debate on acceptance, tolerance and bigotry (and not wanting to offend Kelly by being outspoken, as has happened in the past), I turned back around in my seat and finished my breakfast in silence, unable to acknowledge Sharon after that except to thank her for the meal. The other gentleman did the same. Kelly and the other woman did a nice job of continuing the conversation, which had grown tangibly awkward among those of us at the table, even though Sharon didn't seem to notice. I was intensely impressed (an perhaps a little envious) with the woman's ability to ask diplomatic questions and respond with nonapproving, yet nonjudgemental replies. The meal ended abruptly when Kelly "suddenly" realized that it was time for us to go to meet our river guides.

Before we left on Sunday, Kelly wrote Sharon a note of thanks for her hospitality that weekend and left a post script that said: Good luck with the situation with your neighbors. Take it easy on their lifestyle. We all need a little understanding now and then. I hope sincerely that Sharon reads this and thinks to herself "You know, maybe this is right. And you know what else? Maybe I need a little more understanding and maybe I'd like to be a little better understood." I doubt it, but I do hope that our attempt at diplomacy reaches her somewhere where she houses some openness and free thought.